Cheeseburger Gothic

Best opening par of a wikipedia biography of a Bounders' Club old boy, ever!

Posted July 9, 2013 into Awesome by John Birmingham

Lieutenant-General Sir Adrian Paul Ghislain Carton de Wiart[1] VC, KBE, CB, CMG, DSO (5 May 1880 – 5 June 1963), was an English officer of Belgian and Irish descent. He fought in the Boer War, World War I, and World War II, was shot in the face, head, stomach, ankle, leg, hip and ear, survived a plane crash, tunneled out of a POW camp, and bit off his own fingers when a doctor wouldn't amputate them. He later said "frankly I had enjoyed the war."

21 Responses to ‘Best opening par of a wikipedia biography of a Bounders' Club old boy, ever!’

Moko is gonna tell you...

Posted July 9, 2013

When men were men.

Bunyip mutters...

Posted July 10, 2013

"In his memoirs, Happy Odyssey, Carton de Wiart makes no reference to his wife or to his daughters."

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Sekret Sekret ducks in to say...

Posted July 9, 2013

LOVE.
If it's not bullshit. Sounds slightly apocryphal but maybe it's "you really couldn't make that up"

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Spanner mutters...

Posted July 9, 2013

I just read the whole thing. No man has ever manned in such a manly manner in the history of mankind.

I'm suprised he didn't get shot in the testicles as they must be huge.

NBlob has opinions thus...

Posted July 9, 2013

+1

Anthony asserts...

Posted July 10, 2013

The bullets would just have bounced off...

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robW would have you know...

Posted July 9, 2013

After the first paragraph, the narrative remains as relentless as apparently this man was, up until his retirement in Ireland and "...a life pursuing salmon and the snipe." Sure this isn't fiction?

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Trashman mumbles...

Posted July 9, 2013

He's the real deal. Here's a link to the Army Rumour Service (ARRSE) where they have a much more full bio, along with some other people whose careers read like fiction.

http://www.arrse.co.uk/intelligence-cell/190113-frankly-i-enjoyed-war.html

The site is run by ex UK army, poulated by serving, ex and never were squaddies and is considered unofficially official. Discussions range from current affairs to tall stories you knew from your time in. The humour is robust, so register and post at your own risk!

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HAVOCK21 mumbles...

Posted July 9, 2013

LIKE HAVOCK!...fk yeah baby, that rocks, BALLS of FKN STEEL and a solid fkn single mindedness, POure clarity of fkn thought!, BAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH Cap the fkn muppets! Clarity!

Darth Greybeard mumbles...

Posted July 9, 2013

Yeah. He was one-eyed too.

Darth Greybeard ducks in to say...

Posted July 10, 2013

But if everyone chips in, we might be able to buy this for Havock's next birthday. http://jalopnik.com/the-soviets-built-a-giant-gun-that-could-shoot-nukes-678351145?utm_source=recirculation&utm_medium=recirculation&utm_campaign=afternoon To the Havockmobile!

insomniac puts forth...

Posted July 10, 2013

General Brigadier Supreme GOD Havock MA(df) UC KE(R)

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Sekret Sekret would have you know...

Posted July 10, 2013

It's true? (I only wondered because I knwo some people like to play shenanigans on wiki. In fact Mark Dapin openly encouraged his readers to go in and make up almost anything they wanted about him)

Respect. We owe this man ^^ a drink.

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Rob asserts...

Posted July 10, 2013
wow that makes my life look like a boring piece of crap. (note to self, must join the french foreign legion when my kids leave home.)

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Anthony asserts...

Posted July 10, 2013

Not quite on par with that but I have a relative by marriage who joined the British army and was wounded in Korea, served at Suez and Cyprus and saw vey active service in the Malayan emergency. He then left the Poms and joined the Australian Army, went back to Malaya and then saw active service during the Indonesian Confrontation.

He finished off his army career with two tours of Vietnam. He say the second one doesn't count because no one actually shot at him. He was only under mortar fire. He finished his service as a corporal, however he did make sergeant four times.

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Dino not to be confused with ducks in to say...

Posted July 10, 2013

Amazing,

This guy would ask a sikolojist what the Stanford Binet was for.

Den when he played with a PEP test in 1974 and taken to UNSW and all by his childhood lonesome told by 3 braided and medalled 'suits' that he should study Physics and Chemistry(even though he was only 10 years old and didn't know what P and C were) he would reply-

"Couldn't I do what you guys do?"

Shoshiology?

Where non science types congregate.

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Wayne asserts...

Posted July 11, 2013

The line about Italian suits in the full biographical entry is priceless.

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Rhino has opinions thus...

Posted July 11, 2013

::swoon::

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GMan11 ducks in to say...

Posted July 11, 2013

"In 1908 he married Countess Friederike Maria Karoline Henriette Rosa Sabina Franziska Fugger von Babenhausen eldest daughter of Prince Fugger von Babenhausen and Princess Eleonora Fugger von Babenhausen of Klagenfurt, Austria."

When in the Babenhausen, Fuggering is compusary

Trashman would have you know...

Posted July 13, 2013

Thank you very much I just sprayed Irn Bru all over my screen!

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Disrupting the pink aisle

Posted July 5, 2013 into Awesome by John Birmingham

Anna is probably a little to old for this. But I have young nieces. Nieces, damn it! (With a dad who's an engineer too). This admirable venture by GoldieBox to make toys for girls that go beyond the Princess Barbie Fluffy Pink Tiara Paradigm enjoys my full support.

43 Responses to ‘Disrupting the pink aisle’

Murphy ducks in to say...

Posted July 5, 2013

So, nailing the slippers to the skateboard strikes me as a great way to break one's neck.

One of the things I've always admired about girls is that while the boys are building contraptions that might very well get them maimed, injured or killed, they are standing on the sidelines going, "What a fucking tard?"

As an aside, I hate the color pink. I hate it on everything and everyone.

Terrible color, second only to Purple.

Respects,

Murph

On the Outer Marches

DNABeast swirls their brandy and claims...

Posted July 6, 2013

Or they're using their ballet slippers for ballet which results in more foot and toe injuries than pretty much anything you can think of.

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Barnesm puts forth...

Posted July 5, 2013

Young Girls are aslso taking over the super heroes

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insomniac reckons...

Posted July 5, 2013

The pink doesn't stop just because girls get a little older. Last Christmas we bought our 24 year old (mine) and 25 year old (hers) pink tool sets. If you get to know anything about pink it's the subtle differences in hue, eg hot pink v baby pink.

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NBlob mutters...

Posted July 5, 2013

La Bobette was a full spec Barbie Fan. She went through several sets of fairy wings. Was distraught by Lady Cottington's pressed fairies. The full Pink on Pink with added pink. I fought back galliantly; with lots of lego, at age 4 she new how to say Pyroclastic Flow and what it was, could name the parts of the Shuttle, knew the difference between whales / fish Etc... But yet she loved her Bratz Dolls & Barbie house. She has gone on to do a very Femm- dominated career (Nursing) but was won over to it by a male nurse.

I gues it's a balance thing. Denying any pink is fighting a irresistable force - like boys & guns, but it is important to balance it with construction, thinking, making & building type toys.

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Lulu asserts...

Posted July 5, 2013

I played with (toy) guns & dolls & cars & Lego & Meccano when I was a kid. That is, when I wasn't either reading or climbing trees. Toys are so segregated now that it's quite scary how much we seem to have gne backdawrds in the last 30 / 40 years.

Lulu reckons...

Posted July 5, 2013

"gone backwards", I mean. (Clearly my childhood toys did not include a typewriter.)

NBlob ducks in to say...

Posted July 5, 2013

At least these days one can purchase melanin variable Barbies, with an without epicanthic eyefold. Unlike in the 70's. Allegedly Barbies of colour were available in the US 8 years before anyone thought to sell them in Australia.

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Paul_Nicholas_Boylan ducks in to say...

Posted July 5, 2013

Love it.

They are tapping into an enormous market.

insomniac puts forth...

Posted July 5, 2013

including middle-aged American lawyers?

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JBtoo has opinions thus...

Posted July 5, 2013

There is nothing wrong with pink as an option. The trouble is that all too often there is no option - it is pink or nothing.

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CathieT is gonna tell you...

Posted July 5, 2013

This is one of those moments where I wish I had untold wealth to pick up the Aussie distributorship.

This is a really good concept, and I hope like hell it takes off for her. It's hard enough to enthuse and inspire young people of any generation - and igniting a spark when they're young is really important.

PS. I think I'm going to pop online and buy one to put away for our granddaughter!!

PS For what it's worth, I too dislike pink!

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Darth Greybeard reckons...

Posted July 5, 2013

I'm getting that for the GrandEvil. Small experiment with ours. Please skip if easily bored. Never bought our boy a toy gun or allowed him to be given one. So he made them from sticks & string & Lego. Meh. When he was old enough, I taught him to handle one safely & responsibly - which averted a potentially nasty incident at a friend's place. The girls & he had Lego which they played with together (a plus) but no Barbies. OK there was Cindy or something but less stereotyped. NO toy stoves, irons, brooms etc. And they all turned out (relatively) normal people I like to hang out with. And fiercely opposed, whatever their own varied tastes, to gender stereotyping.

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Blarkon swirls their brandy and claims...

Posted July 5, 2013

Lego tried everything to get more of the female market. There was a small percentage of girls that would play with the traditional sets, but not very many. They went and came with the "Friends" series and it took off and have sales that rival the Star Wars stuff. Lego did an astounding amount of research and found that differently designed sets with different colors would attract girls (though were not attractive to boys) - that girls were looking for things to build that had detailed interiors (whereas boys were more interested in the exterior details)..

There seems to be a disconnect between "what we as enlightened post feminist revolution parents" think girls should play with and what they actually want to play with.

There's also a very interesting assumption that toys marketed at girls are somehow "less valid" than toys marketed at boys. That it's a problem that girls aren't encouraged to play with toys aimed at boys, but there is no problem that boys aren't encouraged to play with toys aimed at girls. That having girls blow up Megatron is more valid than teaching boys to play with toys that have a more "nurturing" focus.

Barnesm mumbles...

Posted July 5, 2013

But then the question arises how much of this desire for girls to want to play with these toys becuase they have been culturally inculcated from infancy to accept this as how they play and what they should play and and how much of a role should our society (ie what we as enlightened post feminist revolution parents) should be shaping girls so they choose these sort of toys and how they contribute to what they see as career/life choices later.

The investigation into gendered toys is an extensive and heavily investigated but since much of the research is funded by toy companies tends to be skewed to sales which are based on the present and not on what might help reduce gender imbalances within socety.

Darth Greybeard mumbles...

Posted July 5, 2013

If the outcome of their "astounding amount of research" was Lego Friends then either the research was directed solely towards maximising profit by leveraging cultural stereotypes (what else?) or maybe I should resign from the human race. I assume we all know the "pink for girls" meme didn't exist prior to the 1920s or 30s?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CrmRxGLn0Bk&list=PLEB080DB5275C5AF7

And a "small percentage of girls would play with the original sets"? Well call us weird but my daughters asked for Lego presents and played with them constantly as did their female friends, cousins etc. I can't offhand recall any girls coming here who didn't gravitate to the Lego bin. Even some older ones.

As for gender-directed marketing, is it really as simple as blowing shit up vs nurturing? Really? Wow. But I guess when you're making a point to us simple folks you have to dumb things down a bit.

Blarkon mumbles...

Posted July 5, 2013

I see you're in the better to go broke toeing the ideological line than it is to create toys that kids actually want to play with camp.

Trowzers ducks in to say...

Posted July 5, 2013

Lego was relentlessly marketed ONLY at boys all through my childhood. Only boys in advertisements, masculine coloured packaging, masculine themed products like cars and trains and spaceships. ONLY boy minifigs. It was a girl free zone. If they had just *tried* some gender neutral products instead of their ill-fated and stupid past attempts to 'break into' the female market, their sales would not have become so skewed.

Despite that, I loved playing with my brother's boxes of lego, but constantly resented that I had to ask permission to use it. Because, despite my obvious love of building castles and spacestations either with my brother or without him, I didn' t own a single piece of lego because people only bought lego for *him*. Not me. People forget that the targetted marketing works on the parents as well as the children. I'm pretty sure that a lot of that Lego bought for boys ended up being played with by girls.

As for this recent Lego gamble with the girl market - if given a choice between the pink boxes and a gender neutral theme eg the Harry Potter lego, I would choose the Harry Potter lego any day. I hate pink, disliked barbies and dolls, so the 'Friends' range would have been completely lost on me. I wanted to build stuff, not play dolls, screw their marketing research.

I still fondly remember building an enormous spacestation with my brother, made with every piece of Lego (two kindy ports full), which we then suspended two stories high from a tree in the backyard. My parents are still finding pieces from it's inevitable re-entry to earth.

Lulu swirls their brandy and claims...

Posted July 5, 2013

Trowzers, that space station sounds AWSM.

Blarkon is gonna tell you...

Posted July 5, 2013

http://julieclawson.com/wp-content/lego_ad_1981.jpg

http://www.crepegeorgette.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/02/tumblr_lxaft2ad3s1r7z1hgo1_500.jpg

Clearly marketing only at boys.

Blarkon is gonna tell you...

Posted July 5, 2013

http://static.thesocietypages.org/socimages/files/2012/04/7.png

http://static.thesocietypages.org/socimages/files/2012/04/81-500x254.png

sbic would have you know...

Posted July 6, 2013

It is not lego's attempt to capture the girl market that is the problem but rather the way they go about it. The role play aspects of lego--as well as the construction and engineering aspects--always had capacity to appeal to both traditional and non-traditional girls and to tap into the more communication-focussed way that makes girls' play different to boys' play (as far as a generalization can be made). The problem is how lego interprets and constructs the situations in which play takes place--girl figs get together and talk at the cafe and shopping mall, not the parliament or the news room--girls' aspirations are not fed by the situations these figures are limited to, and lego has always been an aspirational toy--space travel etc--just not and still not for girls.

Trowzers would have you know...

Posted July 6, 2013

Blarkon, the most recent of those ads would have come out when Lego was still a choking hazard for me. Yes, earlier Legos *were* marketed as gender neutral, and included girls in their ads - especially in the 70s. But that all changed in the mid-80s and 90s.

These are the ads that were playing when I was in the prime Lego age group - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0ErebnbsEGY

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Lulu would have you know...

Posted July 5, 2013

Blarkon, as a middle-aged woman who can remember her own childhood, I can assure you that I loved playing with the traditional Lego sets - I don't think pink fairy princess Lego was even available back then. Something has changed in the last thirty-odd years, and not in a good way.

Barnesm mumbles...

Posted July 5, 2013

Anita Sarkeesian of Feminist Frequency has an analysis of the lego and gender issue which reflects your own experience of a change in the last 30 years. Click here for part one.

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Blarkon reckons...

Posted July 5, 2013

My point isn't that there aren't women who grew up with Lego. It's that the number was always very small. Lego found that the only way to increase that number was to change the Lego so that it became a toy that more girls were interested in playing with. In doing that Lego went from something that a small number of girls played with to something that a substantial number played with.

The "Friends" theme is not particularly princessy http://shop.lego.com/en-AU/Friends-ByTheme - but the colors and design are distinctly different.

Lego, a company that was looking at going out of business a decade ago is now stronger than it has ever been - primarily because they do a lot of research to find out "what kids want to play with" rather than "what parents and society thinks their kids should play with". Toys are a minefield when it comes to parental expectation. What many toy companies have found is that targeting parents only works until a certain age, and then, if you want to make money, you've got to target what the kids what, not what the parents approve of on ideological grounds.

sbic ducks in to say...

Posted July 6, 2013

This argument--that lego is giving girls what they want rather than what their ideologically-driven (one step from politically correct?) parents want--is particularly egregious in reference to a company whose iconic status is based upon their ability to combine parental expectation--we're making engineers and architects of the future--with fun for boys and yet shows no desire to apply the same principles in their girl lines. Lego is not alone in this, it's a lack of vision that permeates girls' toys in general, why lego comes in for flack over it is that it highlights how different approaches are to girls and boys toys for the same company.

Blarkon swirls their brandy and claims...

Posted July 6, 2013

You're letting your own ideological biases show, preferencing the career of engineers and architects over jobs including doctors, teachers, nurses, and lawyers.

sbic ducks in to say...

Posted July 6, 2013

That's the point--if lego friends referenced doctors and lawyers (professions that are proving increasingly attractive to women), that would be a step in the right direction. Instead, "Heartlake city" offers girls the opportunity to shop and bake. If someone gets sick, they'd have to go to the hospital in lego city; if someone wants their pet shampoo'd, heartlake city is all over it. And what you are claiming is this is because that is what girls really want to do ...

I do not preference engineering and architecture as professions for boys or girls--this is what traditional boy-centred lego does.

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Barnesm puts forth...

Posted July 5, 2013

On the lego home page they annual report summary attributes the inmprovements to

Success with both classic and licensed products
Sales of licence based product lines in particular were well above expectations in 2011. This was the case with, for example, with LEGO® products based on Star Wars™, Harry Potter™ and Pirates of the Caribbean™.

Sales of classic lines such as LEGO City, LEGO Technic and LEGO Creator also rose sharply, while LEGO Ninjago, the Group’s major product launch in 2011 – a combination of traditional building sets and so called spinners – exceeded expectations and was the Group’s biggest product introduction ever.

and while Friends has contributed to the rising revenues in the 2012 annual report they identified the new product line Chima as having a much more signficant inpact. In the 2012 annual report the new Friends line i mentioned twice as being a success for exceeding expectations the major profits are still derived from Star Wars, Lego City and ninjarto lines.

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Blarkon swirls their brandy and claims...

Posted July 5, 2013

Be aware that you're quoting the 2011 FY report and that the 2012 report will be different and they explicitly (and only) call out the Friends line when talking about growth in 2012

"In the context of the LEGO Group’s positive results in 2011, global LEGO Group sales are expected to continue growing, producing a satisfactory result for 2012. One of the drivers is the new play theme, LEGO Friends, which along with the existing product range should secure continued sales growth in 2012."

(with the end of the Clone Wars animated series, sales of the Star Wars stuff have naturally dropped off. Until Episode 7 comes out, there won't be as many "completely new" Star Wars sets (though you will see rerelesed stuff - for example the Republic Gunship is seeing its 3rd release))

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Barnesm reckons...

Posted July 5, 2013
But I think you'd agree the Republican Gunship lego would be all the more awesome with the addition of Asoka Tano minifig.

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Blarkon puts forth...

Posted July 5, 2013

The 2008 version of the gunship had an Asaj Ventris mini-fig and the 2013 version has a Padme Armidala minifig.

Barnesm is gonna tell you...

Posted July 6, 2013

and Cartoon Network consistently found through online quizs and focus groups Ashoka Tano was the most popualt character across the female demographic viewer of the Clone Wars TV series. Yet in the lego Star Wars sets one of the least represented.

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JBtoo swirls their brandy and claims...

Posted July 5, 2013

Another girl who loved lego (pre pink blocks) here - and I don't recall being considered weird or unusual. I also liked my dolls, my books and my matchbook cars.
Let girls (and boys) play with whatever they want - just don't limit girls' choices to the pink spectrum and then tell me research shows girls like pink.

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damian asserts...

Posted July 5, 2013

/start Brief Thread Hijack

I think the parents who blame the death of their son on the Rudd government's insulation scheme cheapen all of our humanity. Either they are maintaining a level of stupidity and denial that proves the world really belongs to the cockroaches, or they are milking their own son's death for financial gain in a way that is even more repulsive.

So... you don't want to accept that the dodgy business you let your son work for killed him. Because you'd have to accept some of that blame for yourself, and you'd rather duck that particular emotional bullet. Fine, knock yourself out. But don't go on national television blaming their (and your son's) customers.

/end Brief Thread Hijack

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dewpoint puts forth...

Posted July 5, 2013

That clip is awesome. Brilliant to see girls 'doing' action stuff rather than sitting around 'pretending' to do stuff.

The association of pink/girls is interesting, as GB pointed out it only came about as a meme in the 20's. That would have to be linked with that dastardly marketing psyc related to Freud wouldn't it? The one who linked women smoking to lighting the torch of feminism and very successfully made it hip for women to smoke. Marketing genius. I wonder if the pink/girl boy/blue thing is along the same line or just an insult to anyone of reasonable intelligence, actually it's probably both

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Squid would have you know...

Posted July 5, 2013

In the last week Squid Jr No.1 (2 & 3/4 year old boy) has played with a few Barbies and played a ballerina in a tutu. He's also kicked some footballs (Rugby League and AFL) more than 100 times.

Kids in all their blessed beauty will do whatever the hell they want to do. And that is what is so awesome about them.

Parents will project their own hazy misconceptions about their own childhood upon them, and thankfully that is usually ignored along with every other reasonable request made by same parents.

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Paul_Nicholas_Boylan mumbles...

Posted July 6, 2013

What an interesting discussion this has been.

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MickH mumbles...

Posted July 6, 2013

On my floor at work, there are about 42 engineers. 40 guys and 2 girls.

You'd think that its discrimination wouldn't you but it isn't. My company goes nuts looking for female electrical engineers and the 2 I work with are amazing and bend over backwards to promote the craft to other woman.

But..

It seems they are just not interested, especially caucasian women.

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Paul_Nicholas_Boylan has opinions thus...

Posted July 8, 2013

Barefoot, pregnant and in the kitchen.

Just sayin.

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An advert, but an awesome one. With dogs

Posted July 4, 2013 into Awesome by John Birmingham

8 Responses to ‘An advert, but an awesome one. With dogs’

Squid puts forth...

Posted July 4, 2013

Dog vs Cat argument settled right there.

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Dave W reckons...

Posted July 4, 2013

Awww cute. And not a cocked leg among them.

In other matters, JB, I'm getting this site periodically blocked by my workplace (I know, I know, I should be doing work- but I have legendary powers of procrastination that I need to maintain). Apparently it's due to some type of marri-joo-anna reference/s in the emberverse thread. Can you do anything about making this more camoflaged so that I can continue to procrastinate?

John Birmingham would have you know...

Posted July 4, 2013

I'll see what I can do, but if they block that, there'd be a heap of other stuff they'd block too I reckon.

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Stevo 73 mumbles...

Posted July 4, 2013

Best. Ad. Ever.

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Trashman mumbles...

Posted July 4, 2013

I think I've got dust in my eye. I'm sure that's what it is...

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Peter Bradley asserts...

Posted July 4, 2013

Yes yes you would never see an ad like this with cats. Dogs? Cats? Whatever, they all make our lives a richer experience.

Respect to the guy or girl who got those puppies to stay put in the cart!

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CathieT ducks in to say...

Posted July 4, 2013

Awesome. So awesome I even spelled it correctly.

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Gethbox swirls their brandy and claims...

Posted July 6, 2013

Dominoes. Never fail.

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Your life measured in jelly beans

Posted June 26, 2013 into Awesome by John Birmingham

5 Responses to ‘Your life measured in jelly beans’

Paul_Nicholas_Boylan asserts...

Posted June 26, 2013

I prefer to measure my life in Skittles. There are more of them than jelly beans per volume.

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Barnesm puts forth...

Posted June 26, 2013

I prefer to measure my life in the bollocks of those I have pissed off.

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Barnesm has opinions thus...

Posted June 26, 2013

There is always time for more

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Jacques Stahl swirls their brandy and claims...

Posted June 26, 2013

Life is just a bowl of cherries.

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If you're not watching State of Origin

Posted June 5, 2013 into Awesome by John Birmingham

... allow me to introduce you Mister Patton Oswalt. A stand up comic, visualiser of Star Wars VII (all improvised and kinda brilliant, especially when he ties the Star Wars universe into the Marvel Avengers Universe just after three minute mark)...

and Facebook The Muscial.

Just in case you're not a footy fan.

Me? I'm recording a podcast tonight.

Just in case, you know, you're not a footy fan.

18 Responses to ‘If you're not watching State of Origin’

Brian puts forth...

Posted June 5, 2013
Holy Sith, you just made my night....

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NBlob puts forth...

Posted June 5, 2013

Podcast hey?

SE2KB ?

'A battle a month' a series of 1st person & tactical historian interviews, each epfeaturinng an engagement, kit, new policy, inovations that played out with diggers and enemy. Boer to the Stan. EG; In Seth Efrica more diggers died of disease than action Why? Bomber Command over representation of colonials, why? Consumable, clever, or local talent consumed earlier in the war?

Tell me about your job? Butcher, baker, candlestick-maker, crab pot repairmen all have a half an hour of interesting in them.

Zombie prep 101. A monthly panel discussion of a Zed Related topic. working off a TWD standard Zed.

Just in case you're not into footy.

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Barnesm reckons...

Posted June 5, 2013

What is this Zombie prep 101 of which you speak? is it a poscast. I must investigate, to the nerdhole.

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Mayhem's Mum has opinions thus...

Posted June 5, 2013

One has no need to watch a tribe of muscled young men in skimpy shorts repeatedly tackle each other to the ground and occasionally kick a ball as it is a foregone conclusion that the Cane Toads will suffer an ignominious defeat. Unless of course one enjoys watching tribes of muscled young men ...mmm... in skimpy shorts ...mmm... repeatedly tackling each other to the ground ...mmm... and occasionally kicking a ball. Which one does. Immensely. Ratminion! Fetch me my drooling bib!

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NBlob puts forth...

Posted June 5, 2013
Sorry Brigadier. A suggested, not a yet made podcast.
I've been jabbing JB about this for a while.
He has a good voice. An excellent turn of phrase off the cuff.
A fair to middling ability to extract story from guest, which'd improve with experience.
A well developed sense of & for a story.
I'd like to see him devote a day per month to developing a podcast.
Don't tell him I cant see any way to make a significant $ return on it.

Barnesm ducks in to say...

Posted June 6, 2013

Frell!

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Nocturnalist asserts...

Posted June 5, 2013

Hey NB, this put me in mind of you in re the topic of Greybeard:

http://www.smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=2997#comic

Darth Greybeard mumbles...

Posted June 6, 2013

Dear Nocturnalist, it is clear from your latest emission that you've misunderstood the whole NBlob problem. See, I'm a kind and jolly old chap who hangs around here, spreading joy to bitterly disappointed Queenslanders (who wuz robbed) despite his fear of these computery things. NBlob is a tall sardonic minion of evil and darkness; an imp of Satan sent to taunt me in my twilight. Now I have no proof that he is also "Kitten-Strangler Bikie Bob" or "Black Bob, The Devil's Roadie". But many good and trusty people have said these things and they do ring true. So I beg you to be cautious in your dealings with this fiend and never, ever say his name three times at midnight.

NBlob is gonna tell you...

Posted June 6, 2013

Aha, so It Is because I'm Black*! I knew it. You Bastard!

*contents may be less black than otherwise advertised

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Rhino mumbles...

Posted June 6, 2013

State of Origin ... is that one of those prancy things that pass for sport down there?

How, ummmm, quaint.

Well, off to BBQ some cow and pig meat. Enjoy your couscous and whatever weed you eat while sipping perrier (with a twist if you are daring).

John Birmingham reckons...

Posted June 6, 2013

No, you're thinking about soccer. This is the football code were giant men smash into each other for an hour and a half with no time outs or armour.

Rhino ducks in to say...

Posted June 6, 2013

And what are you doing up so early?

Mayhem's Mum mutters...

Posted June 6, 2013

Take care, Mr Birmingham, Sir. Any further mention of giant men ...mmm... smashing into each other ...mmm... and you may find yourself having to mop up after my hot flash.

It is worth noting also that one was correct in one's assertation that the Cane Toads would suffer an ignominious defeat. In other words, I told you so.

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Rhino asserts...

Posted June 6, 2013

Ahhh ... I see.

But, no denial about the couscous and perrier thing. Very telling.

w from brisbane mumbles...

Posted June 6, 2013

Rhino

This might give you the flavour of the event.
The bad men are wearing blue. The nice men are wearing maroon. In this instance, the very bad man in blue was not penalised for his actions towards our noble, maroon-clad hero.

Which only goes to show that, in this vale of tears, stuck between a pitiless earth and a baneful sky, there is no succour for the good man. But, the good man struggles on, not veering from his virtuous path, and that is what makes the maroon men, well really all Queenslanders, heroes.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AGv61fayADA

Brother PorkChop would have you know...

Posted June 6, 2013

or alternatively, just go to the front page of news.com.au (I know, totally evil, yada yada yada) and you can watch the left right combo in a loop. The thing is that the hittee shook his enormous head a bit and played the rest of the game.

Rhino is gonna tell you...

Posted June 6, 2013

Oh, man, that video was TEH AWSM.

The Rhino loves him some rugby, he does.

I take back my couscous comment. That's for HAVOCK and that poncey cricket crowd.

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Brother PorkChop puts forth...

Posted June 6, 2013

What is the podcast subject JB? Where and when will it be available?

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Respond to 'If you're not watching State of Origin'

14yo kid makes you regret wasting your time on this planet

Posted June 1, 2013 into Awesome by John Birmingham

What were you doing at the age of fourteen? Anything awesome? Probably not. I think I'd written a couple of chapters of a woeful Stephen King style horror novel. So fucking woeful I donated them to the State Library of New South Wales as an encouragement to any would-be writer who came after me.

"Holy crap. This guy was arse. If he can make a living off his keyboard..."

This kid, from Natick, Massachusetts, would probably bury da King if he turned his hand to writing. Luckily for me, he hasn't. He's a photogapher. A fourteen year old photographer, specialising in surreal self portraits.

Really, really worth checking out. Just check any incipient feelings of inadequacy before you hit the link.

This is how I felt, copying Stephen King at 14.

13 Responses to ‘14yo kid makes you regret wasting your time on this planet’

HAVOCK21 swirls their brandy and claims...

Posted June 1, 2013

hmmm, DAM!

FKN HELL and Well yep, he's got fkn talent thats for sure!

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Murphy mutters...

Posted June 1, 2013

John,

He has photoshop.

We didn't.

Self esteem secured.

Respects,

Murph

On the Outer Marches

John Birmingham swirls their brandy and claims...

Posted June 1, 2013

Yeah, nah. You could give me a full featured word processer back in 1979, and that Stephen King book I wrote would still be shit.

Murphy mumbles...

Posted June 1, 2013

I don't know about writing but if I had been given some decent art supplies and knowledge of photography as a teen, I probably could have done fairly well.

As for my writing . . . well, it wasn't Stephen King, but my knack for combat scenes was already there.

Respects,

Murph

On the Outer Marches

Murphy has opinions thus...

Posted June 1, 2013

I should probably add that it is far cheaper for that 14 year old to create works of art like that from his imagination that it would have been for any 14 year old circa the 1980s. Dark room photography alone is a time consuming, soon to be lost art. Toss in the limited number of shots per roll of film, the need for three shot brackets on each subject, and the fact that your negatives may be shit for one reason or another . . .

He's got it easier on the photography side, trust me. Incredible work and talent but I'd argue that it is made possible by access to affordable computer and photographic technology.

Whereas we writers actually need time to mature. Having a Big Chief Tablet and a Number 2 pencil does not a writer make, nor does an IBM selectric or a 386/Apple IIc.

Respects,

Murph

On the Outer Marches

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MickH asserts...

Posted June 1, 2013

That's pretty cool for 14 but what about 15? Did any of us find a new way to detect pancreatic cancer at that age? Well this guy did! Jack Andraka, aged 15. Man! future Nobel peace prize winner for medicine.

Google him.

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MickH swirls their brandy and claims...

Posted June 1, 2013

sorry I ment to add this link

http://theprojecttv.com.au/Jack-Andraka-cancer-breakthrough.htm

MickH has opinions thus...

Posted June 1, 2013

Fuck! this kid has a home made particle accelerator in his basement! Sorry to harp on here, but I'm so impressed with this kid. check out this link, its better: http://www.smithsonianmag.com/science-nature/Jack-Andraka-the-Teen-Prodigy-of-Pancreatic-Cancer-179996151.html?c=y&page=1

John Birmingham mumbles...

Posted June 1, 2013

It's not harping on. It's celebrating the awesome.

Jayanthi's Atomic Cat puts forth...

Posted June 9, 2013
They are awesome. Every picture is like a whole fantasy story in itself. Makes me feel inspired to write something as beautiful as they are.

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pitpat mumbles...

Posted June 1, 2013

I just hope he/they isn't a bright candle that burns fast. We need all the genius that these guys have to offer. They seem pretty well adjusted though and I love that his brother had to bring home his arc furnace because it was getting scary.

MickH asserts...

Posted June 1, 2013

I'm impressed that his mum would wait for for like 12hrs in the carpark for him!

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Sooz mumbles...

Posted June 3, 2013

He'll make a good film compositor in a few years if he keeps at it. Having done that kind of work I have to say he's got a great eye & undeniable talent for his age. I do have to concede, though, it's much easier to do this stuff with digital tools once you know how to use them than it was 25 years ago by double exposure or practical effects. I still love the old hippie fantasy artist Patrick Woodroffe's miniature paintings in real-world settings for this reason.

but guys, there's still room for young artistic brilliance alongside young scientific genius. It's all good!

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