I've been enjoying the challenge of coming up with a non-news related funny column each Sunday. Although, I think I'll be relieved when it's over.
I'm JB and I will be your master for today's class. You might know me from some of the very interesting articles I failed to submit on time, or the amusing columns I never got around to writing at all. I have not published more than a dozen books that I'm sure would have been very popular, and some of which were undoubtedly a lay down misere to not win some quite prestigious awards had they been written … which they weren't.
[Insert your joke about reading it later in the comment thread below].
I write one of these each year for The Age, at about this time each year. Minutes of a meeting with cat and the dog. On the agenda, corporate fitness.
[JB] explained the five stages of the Fitness Friday program, stage one being the very meeting in which they were currently engaged. The consultation phase. Cat and the dog were then asked for their thoughts on how the company might improve opportunities for the staff to exercise more. The dog was very enthusiastic about chasing more cars, barking at nothing and perhaps more vigorous licking of its anus. Cat proposed that it take more high-intensity naps.
I gotta get this done for Blunty. A comedy troupe hired a couple of classical actors to 'perform' a Youtube flame war as an icily murderous dinner table conversation.
It is brilliant.
I always assume everyone sees these things as soon as they hit the webz. But then not everyone spends as much time on the webz as I do. For, er, research. Yes, research.
Anyway, this is how space battles should always be fought.
These guys know how to treat a blog about zombie policy.
(In one of those odd cross overs of this business, the sportsbet.com.au guys asked me to write something for them after I interviewed their poltical markets trader for a feature I'm writing on Rudd).
Anyway, zombie policy. A perennial fave of mine in an election year.